I typed Virgo Characteristics male into google and clicked the first link, It's a site of what to expect dating a Virgo man. As much as I hate to say it alot of it's true, I'll pick out a few quotes which I think apply to me.
"Being in love with a Virgo man means living in a practical world, where there will no be fairytale dreams."
Which loosely translates to:
"You are with Jack now, All hope is lost. He will never be dashing and you will never win the lottery. There's not even a chance his smell will improve"
"To much display of emotions makes them uncomfortable and too conscious"
"If you tell Jack you love him, he will more than likely call you gay and kick you"
"Virgo men do not run after girls and romance, in fact they do not mind being single at all"
In Jack Speak:
"Jack can't get girls."
"Once you have won his heart, His love will burn for you with a steady flame, which will never flicker for a minute."
"YEAHHHHHHHHH WHOAAA, THIS SEX IS ON FIRE!"
"You will have a tender companion, who will shower you with love and care, even though you don't look twenty anymore"
...Will I fuck.
4 out of 5 ain't bad though right? I still reckon it's coincidence that what the lonely woman website said happens to have some similarities with what I'm like. It's taken YEARS of emotional repression and laziness to get to my point of emotional retardation. I've worked hard at being an uncaring arsehole and I'm proud of it. Man, I'm a fucking catch.